Names and titles are a big part of how we identify ourselves and how we express ourselves in our own unique way. They are our identity and play a huge part in our lives, even if we do not realize this. As I said when I first started this blog I was looking into a legal name change for myself. Yesterday when the post came, included was my deed of change name and title. I was thrilled and over the moon to be able to hold the deed in my hand. All I have to do is have a witness watch me sign the form. The witness must be of eighteen years of age, know me but must not be related to me and not sure an address with me; the last one seemed a little odd to me but I guess laws or laws. Thankfully a friend has agreed to meet up with me tomorrow, who hits all of the requirements to be a witness. Even if witness sounds like I'm going to murder someone-actually that might be due to all the TV shows I watch.
It cost £37.00 in total to change both my name and my title, but I personally feel it was money well spent. I changed my title to Mx instead of using Miss because Mx is gender neutral. As a pangender I do feel I am all genders, sometimes I do chose to present myself as a female but not all the time, sometimes this is so inaccurate. Mx leaves more room for fluidness and makes more sense to me being pangender. Yes some pangenders do choose to keep their female or male titles but this simply wasn't an option for me. Being referred to as Miss did not feel "right" so to speak on a personal level. Regardless of how I am feeling or how I chose to present myself Mx will always apply to me. I was so happy to find out that there was a title for non-binary people like me, it was just another small sign that my existence is erased from everywhere and I don't have to feel "wrong". Mx to me fits me more, its a title I am comfortable giving. Also using Mx I got feel like I am misgendering myself to conform to the binary bias which is a plus to me.
The only time misgendering myself will be when I have to get my passport changed. I have a few name so I know I'll have to eventually, however UK passports only allow for F or M. This is a reminder that to a lot of people I don't exist because I don't fall along the binary. In Australian and New Zealand you can opt for an X which yes "outs" you so dreams to visit Yemen where my ancestors come from its a possibility in the near future due to their laws not being so readily accepted. That and the USA has target practice in their weddings and murdering thousands of innocent Yemeni children because they want to show the world how their the land of the free and home of the brave. But I won't get into my issues with the USA and how a first world country is destroying the resources of third world countries even though the man they were after is dead-murdered in front of innocent children as he drank a cup of tea in his living room after ten years of cold blooded slaughter of Arabs citizens by the USA....no I won't get into it at all.
Anyway, back to point, I do feel that the UK should have an alternative and add X to our passports. Or remove gender all together, there was talk of this two years ago so non-binary and trans people weren't forced to out themselves but I don't think it ever went though. Gender neutral passports seem like I much better idea then X as opposed to F and M, but then I still feel that all non-binary people should be given our alternative to it. Doubtful that we will when we do not even have an alternative to male or female; I must stay pangender.
I also have to speak with my bank, sometime after Friday, and get both my address and name changed with them. Legally once I sign the deed I can not use my birth name for anything which means everything must change. I am excited though, since opening myself up as Morgan I have felt much more confident in myself. I resented my birth name, to me it was horrible. It gave me some self esteem issues and for the great deal of my life I was bullied over my name. I went by various nicknames but they never felt right and were a reminder of my name. Morgan fits me, I am happy. I didn't chose it because its gender neutral, I chose it because I liked the name. I've liked it since I was young; originally I planned on naming my first son Morgan after I got over wanting to name my children after fandom characters-two millionth reason people on Tumblr should not be allowed children-but I've taken it for myself now. I don't know what I'll use for my first son but who knows what a pangender parent is suppose to be called anyway. Or how parents and teachers will see him. Given that there is just as much chance I'll fall in love with a girl or fellow non-binary person as of me falling in love with a boyfriend being that I am pansexual, I am have always been worried that queerphobic people won't see past the negative stereotypes. I have always been scared that I will be seen as nothing but a dangerous sexual predator instead of a loving parent just because I am queer. I guess dreams of starting a family myself with a loving partner are also doubtful.
This is shorter then I would have liked, given my absence however I don't have much else to say. Its gone eleven and I really want to make sure that I have posted a blog post for today, even though most of readers won't read this till tomorrow. I was just so determined to blog today rather then want a little longer, its important to me that this blog stays active so other non-binary people know they are not alone.
It cost £37.00 in total to change both my name and my title, but I personally feel it was money well spent. I changed my title to Mx instead of using Miss because Mx is gender neutral. As a pangender I do feel I am all genders, sometimes I do chose to present myself as a female but not all the time, sometimes this is so inaccurate. Mx leaves more room for fluidness and makes more sense to me being pangender. Yes some pangenders do choose to keep their female or male titles but this simply wasn't an option for me. Being referred to as Miss did not feel "right" so to speak on a personal level. Regardless of how I am feeling or how I chose to present myself Mx will always apply to me. I was so happy to find out that there was a title for non-binary people like me, it was just another small sign that my existence is erased from everywhere and I don't have to feel "wrong". Mx to me fits me more, its a title I am comfortable giving. Also using Mx I got feel like I am misgendering myself to conform to the binary bias which is a plus to me.
The only time misgendering myself will be when I have to get my passport changed. I have a few name so I know I'll have to eventually, however UK passports only allow for F or M. This is a reminder that to a lot of people I don't exist because I don't fall along the binary. In Australian and New Zealand you can opt for an X which yes "outs" you so dreams to visit Yemen where my ancestors come from its a possibility in the near future due to their laws not being so readily accepted. That and the USA has target practice in their weddings and murdering thousands of innocent Yemeni children because they want to show the world how their the land of the free and home of the brave. But I won't get into my issues with the USA and how a first world country is destroying the resources of third world countries even though the man they were after is dead-murdered in front of innocent children as he drank a cup of tea in his living room after ten years of cold blooded slaughter of Arabs citizens by the USA....no I won't get into it at all.
Anyway, back to point, I do feel that the UK should have an alternative and add X to our passports. Or remove gender all together, there was talk of this two years ago so non-binary and trans people weren't forced to out themselves but I don't think it ever went though. Gender neutral passports seem like I much better idea then X as opposed to F and M, but then I still feel that all non-binary people should be given our alternative to it. Doubtful that we will when we do not even have an alternative to male or female; I must stay pangender.
I also have to speak with my bank, sometime after Friday, and get both my address and name changed with them. Legally once I sign the deed I can not use my birth name for anything which means everything must change. I am excited though, since opening myself up as Morgan I have felt much more confident in myself. I resented my birth name, to me it was horrible. It gave me some self esteem issues and for the great deal of my life I was bullied over my name. I went by various nicknames but they never felt right and were a reminder of my name. Morgan fits me, I am happy. I didn't chose it because its gender neutral, I chose it because I liked the name. I've liked it since I was young; originally I planned on naming my first son Morgan after I got over wanting to name my children after fandom characters-two millionth reason people on Tumblr should not be allowed children-but I've taken it for myself now. I don't know what I'll use for my first son but who knows what a pangender parent is suppose to be called anyway. Or how parents and teachers will see him. Given that there is just as much chance I'll fall in love with a girl or fellow non-binary person as of me falling in love with a boyfriend being that I am pansexual, I am have always been worried that queerphobic people won't see past the negative stereotypes. I have always been scared that I will be seen as nothing but a dangerous sexual predator instead of a loving parent just because I am queer. I guess dreams of starting a family myself with a loving partner are also doubtful.
This is shorter then I would have liked, given my absence however I don't have much else to say. Its gone eleven and I really want to make sure that I have posted a blog post for today, even though most of readers won't read this till tomorrow. I was just so determined to blog today rather then want a little longer, its important to me that this blog stays active so other non-binary people know they are not alone.
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